Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Theory: Discipline - Preparing for Punishment

Some weeks ago i posted a part of an essay from this website - as such sites can disapear, i will take the opportunity to give you an insight in another essay, that deals with one possible prepartion for any punishment situation. Again this is written from the Male -> Female Perspective, but is also valid more or less in Femdom Relationships. The complete article and more you will find here. The essay must not reflect my thoughts completly, but is still interesting...

It is a general misconception to believe that the man’s role during the
woman’s punishment is active whilst the woman’s is passive. Both men
and women do have very different roles when preparing for the woman’s
punishment. On the face of it, the man does indeed take a more active
stance. He has to choose the correct implement, plan the severity and
duration, remember to adequately scold his woman, plan the best
possible position for her specific offence and plan to spank her
sufficiently through and beyond her tears. The woman on the other hand
appears to take a more passive role. Her role is to yield to her man’s
discipline and surrender herself over to his correction. This is, however,
where the misconception begins. Many women tend to think that the
punishment process is nothing to do with them directly. They believe
that planning and overseeing that their punishment is successful is their
HOH's responsibility and that it is their job to just “go with the flow.” It
is, after all, their HOH who decides the punishment and the HOH who

carries it out – all the woman has to ensure is that she is on the
receiving end. This is in fact where a lot of problems occur. Common
problems such as the inability to cry and the inability to feel full
remorse and learn from their mistakes are mainly due to women not
preparing themselves sufficiently, not their HOH’s inability to punish
them effectively.
This essay will carefully examine different commonly used techniques
that women can use to ensure a successful punishment. Although the
techniques are nothing new and are all standard LDD practises, it is
nevertheless important to point out that if these techniques are
practised cumulatively, then these common female problems can be
overcome. It is essential for the woman to prepare herself for
punishment. Without correct preparation she will never experience the
full benefit from her discipline.
The article will be broken down into three sections, namely, a
submissive woman’s duty “Before” “During” and “After” punishment.


Just as soon as the woman is told of her impending discipline, she should
start the process off with a heart felt apology. This apology is not some
sort of decoy to try and escape from or soften the blows of her
spanking; rather it is one of the first verbal affirmations, to show her
HOH that she is ready for her discipline. It shows that she has taken
responsibility for her actions and is in an accepting frame of mind and
heart to receive the corrective measures needed to modify her
If the woman has not taken accountability for her behaviour and feels no
genuine apology, then it is up to her HOH on what action to take. Some
HOH’s will wait and watch their women closely to see when they have
had a change of heart. This waiting time allows their woman sufficient
time to feel remorse by realising the graveness of their offence. Once
the woman comes to her senses and apologises to her HOH, her
punishment then resumes as normal. Other HOH’s, however, consider
that the woman’s denial needs immediate punishment (or additional
punishments). That swift and rapid action is necessary to put the woman
into a more receptive frame of mind. If the woman is prone to
stubbornly denying her wrong doing, then it is probably more beneficial
to consider a more rapid approach with additional discipline.


Corner Time
Corner Time is possibly the most important time for women to prepare
for their spanking. It is a woman’s duty to take full advantage of Corner
Time and use this time effectively. Corner Time is not simply a break
from the spanking (if it is used in the middle of her punishment). It is
not the time for the woman to check her watch or mentally start
preparing the evening meal. Rather, it is an extremely useful time to
reflect over her misbehaviour and mentally prepare herself for the
ordeal of her discipline. Effective preparation during Corner Time can
usually produce a successful punishment, where the woman is
compliantly brought to tears without any resistance to the discipline. It
is in the woman’s interest to mentally prepare for the severity of her
discipline. It is certainly going to be painful and her duty as a submissive
woman is to endure the pain by obediently maintaining her position.
Some women are very frightened before their punishment. Although fear
can be a good thing, too much fear can make her skittish and jumpy
which will more than likely take her out of position during her spanking.
If the woman suffers unduly with fear she should take the opportunity
during Corner Time to relax and take deep breaths. She should confirm
to herself that no lasting damage will be done, that her bottom can
endure even the most severe blows. She should confirm to herself that
she trusts her HOH. That whatever implement he uses, she is safe in the
hands of the man who loves her more than anyone else in the world.

If the woman is guilty of committing an offence, she should
communicate this immediately. If she is too frightened to face her HOH,
she should journal her misconduct for her HOH to read at a later date.
Not owning up to a misbehaviour is very detrimental since she mentally
absolves herself from that specific wrong doing. It allows the woman to
carry on regardless, thinking that her behaviour is more or less OK. If
the woman is not honest about all her offences, then there is little
surprise if she doesn’t feel completely remorseful and responsible for
the ones she does own up to. There is little surprise that she cannot
release her tears and truly experience the effectiveness of each and
every punishment.

Some women think that if their HOH forgets about a punishment that
they are somehow “let off the hook.” This kind of thinking is very
negative. Loving Domestic Discipline is a two way process, it is actually
the woman’s responsibility to respectfully remind her HOH about her

punishment. However, caution should be taken to be extra respectful
whilst she is reminding her HOH - since she is migrating into his
territory. Some HOH’s may feel undermined about the woman’s
reminder and feel that their authority is challenged. If the woman’s
HOH does not take kindly to being reminded, the woman should journal
an entry stating that no punishment took place. She should also enter
her feelings about it. If she was relieved she should say so, or if she was
upset that she had needed the punishment to unburden her and bring
her forward as a better person, then that is what she should write. She
should remember to write honestly and not just say what she thinks her
HOH wants to hear. Writing a truthful account of her feelings will serve
as a useful landmark in evaluating how much her thoughts and actions
have improved over time and how much she has grown as a woman.
If the woman feels frustrated about her man’s forgetfulness and knows
he won’t take too kindly to a reminder, she should take responsibility
over her frustration. She should go for a run or long walk and try to vent
off some of this frustration. Picking an argument in the hopes that he
may spank her, is just childish. Bratting should never be engaged in, no
matter how much the woman is in need of her spanking. At the other
end of the scale, it is also very childish for the woman to refuse
punishment by making up some lame excuse of having a bad migraine or
period pain. If the woman is irresponsible and inclined to such deception
then the discerning HOH should deal with these issues under a separate
It is the woman’s responsibility to come when called and promptly start
preparing herself for punishment. Stalling the disciplinary process by
procrastinating or being unduly slow should also be dealt with severely.
Anything that hinders the flow of correction is both detrimental to the
woman and a waste of her HOH’s time. The woman should not be at all
surprised if she does not truly benefit from her discipline if 99% of the
time she is fighting her punishment each step of the way.


Remaining Silent
During the woman’s spanking there should not be any verbal
communication with her HOH, unless he directly asks her a question, or
requires her to count out each impending stroke. If the woman
genuinely feels nauseous, dizzy or ill, then that is the only time she
should respectfully communicate this to him. Her spanking is not a time
to exercise her vocals and scream at the top of her voice, nor is it a
time to yell or plead for her spanking to stop. The preparation time
before her punishment, should have placed her in a more accepting
frame of mind to welcome the spanking as a much needed tonic,which
will help her grow as a woman. Yelling or pleading for her punishment to
stop is not helping her benefit from her punishment. By submissively
accepting her spanking and meekly complying, she will be more
receptive to her own emotions and will not fight her surrender to
Holding Position
There is no doubt that the woman’s spanking will hurt. There is no
doubt that a punishment spanking is meant to be an unpleasant
experience. Discipline is meant to hurt. If it was a pleasant experience
then it would have no effect punitively and there would be a danger of
the woman misbehaving on purpose. Holding position without kicking,
clenching, pushing up, twisting from side to side or blocking is possibly
one of the most difficult challenges for the woman. The woman must
work on submissively yielding to her swats without coming out of
position. Coming out of position not only makes her HOH’s job harder,
but it is also cheating the woman out of an effective punishment. If all
her energy is concentrated on rebelling then she won’t be in a
submissive frame of mind necessary for catharsis. By compliantly
maintaining her position she will discover the very profound depth of
her femininity and submission. As soon as she stops fighting her spanking
she will find herself rewarded by becoming so much calmer and in tune
with the whole disciplinary process. Her contrition and remorse will
bring her deeper into accepting her punishment rather than rebelling
against it. Once her mind becomes more focused on her misbehaviour
rather than rebellion, she will find herself entering a new awareness
where her complete obedience during discipline results in her deep
cathartic surrender.
Accepting Each Discipline Graciously
Even if the woman is implicated in an offence she did not commit she
should nevertheless prepare for her punishment in the same way
regardless. If she has committed no offence she will still benefit from
her punishment. She can use it as a practise session to work on her
obedience and submission. For many women this seems unduly harsh if
not unfair, but the alternative to this by refusing discipline would
seriously undermine her man’s masculinity. It is the woman’s duty as a
submissive woman to constantly uphold her man’s authority. It is not
easy being a HOH, the woman’s job is to obey and comply - such
obedience from the woman strengthens her HOH’s leadership and
Accepting an unjust punishment is possibly one of the most difficult
tasks for a woman. However, accepting her punishment when it was not
her fault does have far greater rewards. By graciously yielding herself to
an offence she did not commit enhances the epitome of her femininity
and submission. After some time has elapsed she should of course tell
her HOH that it wasn’t her fault. Her HOH at this point may feel
terrible; it would be up to the woman to put his mind at rest by telling
him how much the discipline had helped her with her submission. This
also greatly rewards the woman since the HOH will think her submission
and obedience to him as quite exemplary.
Naturally, if the woman has a chance before the unjust discipline to
respectfully communicate to her HOH that she is innocent then she
should of course do so. But a situation may present itself where the HOH
is very angry and wants to take immediate action. The woman should
naturally, never communicate her innocence before her spanking in such
a situation, since it may end up in a battle of wills. Such refusal would
tarnish her submission and undermine her man’s role as HOH. The
woman’s duty is to uphold her man and lovingly support him in his role.


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